Sending my last kid to college
It's the final leg of a really long slog and I've got the Target receipt to prove it. PLUS: two weekends of great reading.
Hi Midlifers,
On Saturday I took my youngest child back-to-school shopping to load up on supplies to bring back for his final year of college. We walked around Target and filled our big red cart with everything a young man needs to finish out his academic career living in a house with eight other gentlemen. That is to say, an extraordinary amount of cleaning supplies — like an industrial sized jug of Dawn dish soap and a four-pack of bleach wipes — which may or may not be deployed over the next nine months. I just know that I’ve done my part.
Last year when he moved into the house, my younger daughter and I drove the 4+ hours west to help him move in and my first impression as I walked into the house was that it had not been updated since the Reagan administration. The downstairs kitchen (there’s a smaller one upstairs) had random assortment of plates and cutlery, an old mop stood sentry next to the front door and the wall-to-wall carpet was terrifying.
We went to WalMart to load up on essentials and squeezed into a spot in the house’s narrow parking lot, dangerously close to a neighbor’s gas grill, and made multiple trips up and down the stairs to bring it into his new room. Then, my daughter and I got to work making his bed and doing all the things that we’ve all become extraordinarily good at after moving each other into new living spaces over the last 14 years. As I stretched the elastic of the fitted sheet over the corner of his new mattress we bought on Amazon, my son asked if his sister and I wouldn’t mind taking off our shoes in his new room.
Reader, I would rather have had all my toes amputated. Just lopped off right there, and left to bleed to death in the middle of Pennsylvania. But I kept my mouth shut (thanks to a death glare from my daughter) and gave thanks that I’d opted to wear socks with my sneakers early that morning and prayed I did not contract syphilis from the shag carpet underfoot.
Later, I found myself on my knees bent over the Dirtiest Tub in America™ trying to scrub off generations of grime and thinking that if my youngest child ever questioned my love, I would pull this moment out of my back pocket as evidence to the contrary. There is no one else in the world for whom I would have voluntarily gotten that close to that bathroom floor. Again, syphilis.
My daughter and I finished setting up his room, hugged our baby good bye, and then headed halfway home to collapse on a clean hotel bed and eat candy watching Sex and the City reruns on the TV. The college kid sent us a picture late that night of a sitting room on the second floor that the boys had been busy covering the paneled walls with all manner of beer signage and posters. There were a bunch of boys crammed in the room watching sports and my son’s face looked so happy.
Since my son is staying in the same house this year, I’ll just be waving good bye to him from the sidewalk when he pulls out on Thursday morning to head back for senior year. And as I watch him drive off in my Honda packed with fresh sheets, microwaveable bowls of white rice from Costco and a pile of new notebooks, I’ll have officially begun my tour of “lasts.”
After 13 or 14 years of sending someone to college, I’m finally about to graduate. I’ll be saying good bye to move ins, football weekends and most importantly, tuition payments. The year will no longer start in September and I won’t have to pay an additional rent on a living space that should in all fairness be condemned.
I remember pulling into my little driveway after the long ride home following my third kid’s graduation from the same big state university. It had been a long weekend of ceremonies and family time with me and the other three kids crammed into a room at the Super 8 that had jacked up prices for graduation weekend.
When that third kid started college, there was still overlap with an older sibling and I was paying my portion of two tuitions for a few years, and I really don’t know how I did that. Well, that’s not true — I had to sell my house and downsize. So when I pulled into the driveway of the new, smaller house following that third graduation weekend, I remember putting the car in park, resting my forehead on the steering wheel, and screaming I FUCKING DID IT. Like, really loud. Because I had put three kids through college.
And so reader, here we are at the start of that very last leg of getting the fourth one through. We’ve got the back-to-school shopping checked off the to-do list and later, I’ll make the last of my two remaining tuition payments. The older kids and I bought tickets to go out to a football game in the fall and I already have a hotel room reserved for graduation in May.
I am almost there.
sunday shares: read + watch + cook + buy
A fresh start. I am a firm believer that boys’s college bedding should be set fire to tossed at the end of each year. It’s just, like, gross. We were really into this line of jersey comforters at Target and grabbed the nice olive color that I will next see in a trash bag in May.
A real page turner. I’ve spent the last two weekends thoroughly engrossed in a book. This weekend, it’s Liz Moore’s The God of the Woods. I can’t put it down. Here’s how Kirkus sums it up: “Many years after her older brother, Bear, went missing, Barbara Van Laar vanishes from the same sleepaway camp he did, leading to dark, bitter truths about her wealthy family.” I’m only halfway through so who knows if the author will stick the proverbial literary landing but so far, it’s a real page turner.
Give me all the romantic heroines wearing Costco panties. Last weekend, I ploughed through Annabel Monaghan’s delightful Summer Romance. Aly is in her late 30s with three young kids and a jerky husband who’s divorcing her. There’s a meet-cute in a dog park where her pup pees on a cute guy’s let and a slow awakening to who she is and what she wants from a partner and her life. Perfect late-summer read.
What I’m eating when my son leaves. I can’t stop thinking about this video and think I’m just going to eat cucumbers after my son goes back to school.
Stuff my sister bought. This denim dress at Old Navy seems to be selling like hotcakes. My sister nabbed the darker wash but now only this lighter wash is left. Everything is 40% off at ON this weekend and 50% if you are a cardholder.
THANK YOUUUUUUU for reading. Really, you guys are the best. As always, thank you for taking the time to read this post. I’m truly so glad you’re here. If you like what you’re reading, please consider sharing this newsletter. (And if you have the time to like it, that would mean a lot to me!) Your support is appreciated.
See you next Sunday, xoAmy.
"Reader, I would rather have had all my toes amputated." You never fail to crack me up. I know these carpets! And, oh, that tub cleaning is an act of pure love. Congratulations on this milestone! You are amazing! I'm in the middle of The God of the Woods--so good! We must discuss when we finish! xx
That was incredible. I felt like I was right there. Brilliant assessment of the parents' side of the college college. A lot of driving and Target visits!