congrats on your sober milestone. i admit the nonalcoholic wines you were drinking at the oyster bar were actually tempting!
i’ve been doing a lot of thinking these days about addiction for various reasons but looking at my own choices. i struggle w different mechanism than alcohol but still reckoning w those different “parts” of myself, whether something is nourishing or just giving me a desired dopamine rush that pulls me thru tedium of daily life? trying to find the nourishing ways ... so far, my kid! rural night skies, birdwatching, art museums, dining out (even alone!), the ocean have all provided enjoyable moments getting me more comfortable w solitude. but you’re right, some days suck.
Coming from a large family who embodies the ethnic stereotype (i.e. Irish 😂), sobriety is a choice you make again and again. Sometimes it’s easier than others, but it’s generally a conscious decision for those of us who have the “it’s so hard to stop once I get going” gene. Congratulations on three years! 🎉. Many more.
Eileen, LOL the "ethnic stereotype" with that "where did I put my OFF button?" gene. I really lean into playing that mental tape in my head when the voice telling me I could drink again some day really starts in. The one that I play that shows what happens when I have "just one" drink. All the ones that come after, with despair and self-loathing riding in their wake. A good reminder of all that not drinking protects me from. Thank you for reading and chiming in. :)
For me, drinking was definitely something I used to for hiding and numbing. But I see it in other things I do — bingeing shows on TV or scrolling, scrolling, scrolling on my phone. It's been nice plucking the booze out of the gears of my life, which it had been gumming up for so long. It's let me move forward and start figuring out (in my mid-50s) exactly who I am and what I want to be (hey, it's never too late!). I'm not sure where it's all going, but at least it's going.
Congrats on 3 years of freedom! 😍. And boy do I love that Laura McKowan. Xoxo
FREEDOM, indeed. Feels so good. And Laura was really the push I needed to quit for good (or at least, decide every day I'm not gonna drink).
Congratulations!
congrats on your sober milestone. i admit the nonalcoholic wines you were drinking at the oyster bar were actually tempting!
i’ve been doing a lot of thinking these days about addiction for various reasons but looking at my own choices. i struggle w different mechanism than alcohol but still reckoning w those different “parts” of myself, whether something is nourishing or just giving me a desired dopamine rush that pulls me thru tedium of daily life? trying to find the nourishing ways ... so far, my kid! rural night skies, birdwatching, art museums, dining out (even alone!), the ocean have all provided enjoyable moments getting me more comfortable w solitude. but you’re right, some days suck.
Coming from a large family who embodies the ethnic stereotype (i.e. Irish 😂), sobriety is a choice you make again and again. Sometimes it’s easier than others, but it’s generally a conscious decision for those of us who have the “it’s so hard to stop once I get going” gene. Congratulations on three years! 🎉. Many more.
Eileen, LOL the "ethnic stereotype" with that "where did I put my OFF button?" gene. I really lean into playing that mental tape in my head when the voice telling me I could drink again some day really starts in. The one that I play that shows what happens when I have "just one" drink. All the ones that come after, with despair and self-loathing riding in their wake. A good reminder of all that not drinking protects me from. Thank you for reading and chiming in. :)
For me, drinking was definitely something I used to for hiding and numbing. But I see it in other things I do — bingeing shows on TV or scrolling, scrolling, scrolling on my phone. It's been nice plucking the booze out of the gears of my life, which it had been gumming up for so long. It's let me move forward and start figuring out (in my mid-50s) exactly who I am and what I want to be (hey, it's never too late!). I'm not sure where it's all going, but at least it's going.
Congrats on your sober-versary! I love the way you describe the two births back to back.